Nora's Birth Story

On Thursday, October 13, Billy and I went to my OB for my 39 week check-up.  We were seen by a doctor we hadn't met yet, and though our experience with my OB group has otherwise been very positive, we were discouraged when she told me I had an "unfavorable cervix."  After the visit, I emailed  an update to my mom and a few others, telling them I was upset because I felt I was progressing even if this OB didn't. I ended the email with "Then again, maybe Baby D was just looking for a chance to prove someone wrong, and this visit will speed her up."  Famous last words!

A few hours later, at 12:30am, I woke up in pain.  After deciding these contractions might be the real thing, I woke Billy up to have him time them for me.  Most of the contractions were about 5 minutes apart, but they were not a full minute long, and their length and duration varied.  I told him to go back to sleep, and though I tried to do the same, the pain was too distracting, so I got up and started getting things together for the hospital.  Around 5:30am I woke Billy up to keep track again, and by then the contractions were very regular.  At 6:30, I was trying to decide how long I'd wait before calling the doctor when I experienced a very strong contraction and my water broke.  Decision made!  As soon as the doctor heard that my water had broken, she told me to come to the hospital.  Billy and I finished getting things together, called Vickie, and headed to the hospital.

After being admitted by the triage nurse, we were anxious to see which doctor would be coming on call at 8am and were excited when Dr. Penn popped in to ask, "Are we going to have a baby today?"  Billy and I had appreciated his good humor, laid back attitude, and straightforward answers in our office visits with him.  I was similarly thrilled when the initial check revealed that I was already between 3 and 4 centimenters dilated.  We met our delivery nurse, Lora, who got us into a birthing room. Vickie arrived shortly thereafter to offer her support.  Though I had been nervous about the medical staff respecting my wishes regarding a natural childbirth, Lora and Dr. Penn were extremely supportive of my requests.  I was put on intermittent fetal monitoring, I was given a heparin lock but was not attached to an IV, and I was given one of the largest delivery rooms, which allowed me plenty of room to move around.  I was also permitted to walk around on the floor as much as I wanted.

From that point onward, my sense of time became fairly disoriented and my memories of labor are not particularly linear.  The contractions grew increasingly worse, as I expected they would.  It also became more and more difficult for me to endure contractions while sitting or lying down.  While kneeling over the bed or standing, the pain was fairly isolated in my belly, but if I was sitting or lying, the pain surged up through my whole body and burned around my tailbone.  The strategies I'd learned helped me endure the contractions in the standing and kneeling positions, but those positions made it difficult to relax in between contractions, so I felt myself getting worn out.  I also hadn't slept well Wednesday night, and hadn't taken a nap Thursday, so I felt like I was more exhausted than normal before I even went into labor.

The support I got from Billy and Vickie did the most to help me endure the difficult contractions.  Billy helped me remember the things we'd learned in childbirth class, gave me periodic suggestions, and gave me constant reassurance that I was doing a good job.  Vickie encouraged me to hang in there, and her medical knowledge and calming presence made me feel at ease when interacting with the hospital staff.  Both of them were there to support me physically, as well, whether I needed a reassuring touch to help me relax or a strong shoulder to brace against during a bad contraction.  They also helped ease my tension and anxiety, and hearing them casually interact with one another helped to take my mind off the pain.

The other thing that helped me endure were the mental strategies I had been preparing for the past few months.  Our childbirth instructor told us to remember that "an intense contraction is an effective contraction," so I repeated that to myself when the pain got bad.  It also helped to visualize my cervix thinning and opening up as a result of the pain.  When it got hard to breathe, it helped to recall all those times I've been on long runs and have willed myself to keep going.  I also imagined the contractions as similar to weightlifting sets at the gym.  When it began to feel like too much pain, I kept telling myself just get through two more contractions.

After several hours of laboring in the hospital, though, it did get to be too much for me.  I asked if I could get into the tub in hopes that it might relieve some of the pressure, but my doctor asked me not to do that because my water had broken so many hours prior and he did not want me to risk infection.  I asked for a cervical exam because I was beginning to feel like I needed some pain medication, and I was discouraged when they told me I'd only progressed to around 5 or maybe 6cm dilation.  Lora told me that Dr. Penn had ordered me a dose of an analgesic pain medication that could be administered via IV if I needed it, but because I knew about the risks associated with the drug and the way it crosses the placenta to reach the baby, I told Lora I wanted to keep trying to make it without the medicine.

At that point, I kind of withdrew within myself to give some serious thought to the decision.  I was very committed to a natural childbirth because of the benefits it affords the baby.  But I also promised myself early in my research that if I passed the point of being able to endure the contractions, and I found myself suffering through the contractions, I would allow myself to get some help.  The contractions continued to get worse, and the pain in my belly was soon accompanied by intense pain in my back no matter what position I tried.  I knew that the analgesic was supposed to help ease the pain of the contractions but should not interfere with my ability to feel what was going on.  Ever since we'd gotten to the hospital, the fetal monitoring revealed that Nora was in great shape, so this helped me feel better about getting the medication.  Plus, I thought she might even benefit if her mom was having an easier time.  When another cervical exam revealed that I was around 6cm dilated, I knew taking a dose of the medicine at that point, rather than continuing to wait, would maximize the amount of time my body had to metabolize the drug before Nora was born.  I hoped this would minimize any impact it could have on her.  Eventually, there was no way for me to deny that I was suffering, so I asked for the medication.

I felt the effects of the analgesic immediately after it was administered through my IV.  For the first 20 minutes or so, I was kind of out of it and I was saying goofy things to Billy and Vickie.  Thereafter, I still felt intense pain during the contractions and had to rely on my coping strategies to endure them, but it was much easier for me to relax and rest between contractions.  I feel like this gave me the renewed energy I needed to be able to make it through the transition phase of labor.  When I could feel Nora's head dropping fairly quickly, I asked to be checked again because I felt sure that it was time to push.  Dr. Penn told me that I needed to wait a while longer, so it was a huge relief around 3:15pm when he finally told me I could try to push.  Vickie then left Billy to care for me so he and I could be alone when our baby was born.

I only had to push for around 20 minutes, and this was far and away the most painful and most rewarding portion of labor for me.  For the first time during my pregnancy, I felt like I was actually in control of what was happening to my body and my baby's.  I could not believe how loud I was screaming until Lora suggested I direct that energy toward pushing.  When Nora's head became visible to Dr. Penn, he told me she had a lot of long brown hair.  From that point onward, I knew I was birthing the baby I had imagined in my head and I became a woman on a mission.  Everyone encouraged me so much, and I could feel how much progress I was making while pushing during each contraction.  This helped me keep pushing harder and enduring the extreme pain.  Billy surprised me by choosing to watch Nora emerge, and this meant he could also give me verbal affirmation that I was getting close.  He also confirmed that she came out in the posterior position, which helped explain the back pain I experienced during contractions.  While I was pushing and could feel Nora passing through the birth canal, I was hit full force by the realization that I was bringing a baby into the world, and I experienced a stronger sense of accomplishment than I've ever known before.

Then, all of the sudden, I'd pushed enough, Nora was born, and Billy was cutting the cord.  I looked over at Billy, who had an expression of pure joy on his face, and I was overwhelmed by the realization that we had created a real, live, human.  They let me hold Nora as long as I wanted before weighing and measuring her to confirm that she was perfectly healthy and alert.  By then, Vickie had come back, so she was able to share in our excitement.  Then they gave Nora back so I could nurse her for the first time, and I was so relieved when the techniques I'd researched and Nora's instincts worked together to result in a very successful first breast feeding.

I was overwhelmed again when I was there with Billy, Vickie, and Nora, and I realized that even though things hadn't gone exactly according to my birth plan, I had a healthy baby and I had gotten to experience childbirth in a way that was very meaningful to me.  I anticipate that I'll try to have a natural childbirth again next time, and I hope I'll be able to do it, but I still feel confident that I made the right decisions for me and for Nora this time. I realize how much good fortune it takes for a baby to be born healthy, and how many strokes of luck it takes for the baby's birth to go as the mother plans, so I know how fortunate I am that I got to come away from the delivery room with a healthy, beautiful baby and a rewarding birth experience.  Plus, my recovery has thus far been so quick and painless that I can't imagine birthing a baby any different way.

Patti had been waiting in the waiting room for the better part of the day, so she joined us in the delivery room shortly thereafter, and it was not long before Chuck and Brian also arrived at the hospital and were admitted to the delivery room.  It was fun to share Nora's name for the first time and see how excited they all were about her arrival.  Vickie and Billy began texting people to let them know Nora had been born, the first picture of her began circulating on facebook, and I got a chance to talk to Mom and Nate after we were settled in our recovery room.  I guess that is where the story of Nora's birth ends, and where the story of her life begins. : )  We can't wait to see all the fantastic things her life has in store for her and for us!

We did it!  Nora and her Mama shortly after childbirth.